A little quiet

I just wanted to explain why I have been a little quite and why there may be a delay in writing posts/replies. I had a very rough night on the Friday just gone and an ambulance was called for me Saturday morning. I refused to go into hospital (it always makes me sicker) so after consultations I’m being treated at home. I’ve finally been given stronger pain medication, which is helping a bit and a few tests/assessments are being fast-tracked. I’m exhausted, frustrated and my immunity is very low but I hope I can post/comment soon as talking to you all helps to make me feel a little better. I’ll pop in and out when I can.

In the meantime this little one has been a wonderful nurse and is keeping close to me.

WP_20150622_13_45_58_Pro WP_20150424_08_12_39_Pro

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The Sisterhood of the World Nomination

sisterhoodoftheworld

The lovely Kira from https://kirabmoon.wordpress.com/ kindly nominated me for this award. A big thank you to Kira and please take a moment to check out her blog. Many of you probably know how these awards work but the rules are that I answer 10 questions and then nominate 7 other bloggers and ask them to answer the same 10 questions.

First the questions:

Why do you have a blog?

I wanted to connect with people and whilst I can be quite awkward in most social situations I am at my best when I can write. I also wanted to show that being sick and disabled is not an ‘old person’ thing, that it affects people of all ages and that those of us that are inflicted by such things want the same access to life experiences as healthy people – especially the fun stuff!

What inspires you the most?

Can’t choose between two so I will have to say animals and literature.

Favourite animal and why?

Again, I’m going to be a chicken and name two – cats and dogs. I have two cats and one dog. I’ve had cats since I was 9 and they are amazing animals, smart, funny, strong and affectionate. Cats also make you work for their love which I kind of admire.

I have always wanted a dog and when I got my health up to a decent standard a few years back my dog Keats was my reward (unfortunately I have relapsed quite dramatically 8 months ago). Keats was worth waiting for! Dog’s are devoted, loving, sweet, and kind. My dog follows me everywhere (I mean everywhere!) and can never get enough cuddles. One of my favourite things to do was to go on walks with Keats but since my relapse my friends and family now have that pleasure.

What is your favourite colour?

Red! Like the poppies which are my favourite flowers.

Do you prefer the ocean or mountains?

Ocean. I love the sea, the sound, the taste of the air, the enormity of it and it’s movement. I’d love to live by the sea.

Tea or coffee?

Tea. I love the smell of coffee but I can’t bear the taste.

How many languages can you speak?

Embarrassingly only one and that is my native language. I’d love to learn French and Russian but at the moment I struggle enough with English.

What made you happy today?

My animals.

What is your dream?

To have a fulfilling career that enables me to travel and have a house by the sea. If I could get paid to write that would be pretty amazing!

What is your favourite food?

Fishfinger sandwiches. I lived off them whilst I was at uni.

Secondly, here are my 7 nominations:

https://effingfibro.wordpress.com/

https://rhosynmd.wordpress.com/

https://peachteapot.wordpress.com/

https://faloolar.wordpress.com/

https://undiagnosedwarrior.wordpress.com/

http://therheumaticrollercoaster.com/

https://zoerising.wordpress.com/

Learning to be social

Our world’s can become very small we are burdened by chronic illness and people can seemingly drift away from you as you become increasingly confined to your house or bed. It can be lonely, frustrating and incredibly dull! As illness and pain snatch you further indoors the world can seem so distant that it can become alien. When your bed becomes your world Earth may as well be in another galaxy. I had no knowledge whatsoever of social media and only really used the computer for shopping and typing. Technology baffled me, I only opened a Facebook account a few years ago and did so reluctantly.

I am naturally a shy person who feels awkward in many social settings so I feared that as there are much more people online I would find loads more people to be awkward around and 100 more opportunities to make a fool of myself. But in January I became sick of being excluded from conversations and wanted to connect with others. I was and still am often confined to bed so the only course open to me was to use the internet to reach out. I had zero knowledge of social media but after looking around I thought blogging would suit me, so one restless night searching for a distraction from the pain I made my first post.

Blogging has been such a source of comfort for me these past months. I love writing and always felt more comfortable in that medium than any other so I’ve felt less shy and felt more comfortable to express myself. And blogging, best of all, has brought me into contact with some incredible people. As I’ve enjoyed blogging so much I started to think about other social media sites as I know many of you bloggers out there have several other links on your blogs to Twitter etc. My knowledge of how such sites work and how best to interact with them is very poor but I decided to give them a go. I warn you that I have no clue what I’m doing but if you would like to follow or contact me any other way there are some social media icons at the side of this page you can click or you can click these links below or on my About Me page.

Twitter: @moderngirlsick

Pinterest:  https://www.pinterest.com/elliesimaginary/

Instagram: https://instagram.com/elliesimaginaryfriend/

My blog will always be main focus but I thought it might be fun to branch out a bit. x

Contact

I’ve only just realised that I haven’t properly written on my about page – duh! I really thought that I had written one but it only shows my Gravatar and not one specific to The Modern Girl’s Guide. As I haven’t I will do. But until I write one properly if anyone would like to contact me my email is elliesimaginaryfriend@gmail.com

I will sort myself out one of these days! x

The Importance of Information

Yesterday I had a health assessment in my own home to see if I qualify for a UK benefit called PIP (Personal Independence Payment). I have been stressed and anxious at being ‘tested’ and I was in a lot of pain yesterday. I am still in pain today. That pain is being worsened by another ‘test’ that I have been summoned to take on June 18th. I have spoken to quite a few of my followers who have been going through similar things; applying for welfare, seeking medical support, financial worries and dealing with prejudice relating to their conditions. I have also been amazed at how despite some people I have talked to being from countries outside the U.K., even as far a-field as Australia and America, their experiences are so similar to ours in the UK. And I have also been shocked to find that the institutional and societal prejudices that have been increasing in Britain regarding chronic illness and invisible disabilities are also present in other countries.

In the belief that key to The Modern Girl’s Guide to Being Sick is the importance of information and that as knowledge is power, the more we share and add to that knowledge the stronger we become I would welcome people to post any links they have found useful in managing life with their conditions, or share any advice or tips they would give others.

Two links I have found useful the past few days regarding UK benefits have been:

http://actionforme.org.uk/Resources/Action%20for%20ME/Documents/get-informed/esa-appeals-factsheet.pdf

http://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/personal-independence-payment-pip/pip-points-system

I have given longer descriptions and analysis of the processes on my sister blog: https://theillrepresented.wordpress.com/

I’m chuffed, so thank you x

200 Likes

I know people don’t often post their ‘reward stickers’ for how many likes they get but for a blog that’s only been going 4-5 months I’m really grateful for all the support people have given me. I started the blog as a way to connect and share experiences with others and as a means of giving me something positive to focus on. Chronic illness cruelly isolate people and I’ve found blogging a great way to fend off this isolation. So a huge thank you to those of you that have taken the time to click ‘like’.  x

likes = smiles

Take Advantage of Every Little Positive

Wrestling with Sleep

A key feature of all my conditions is persistent fatigue, the type that lashes at you with every breath and with every effort those lashes sting over wounds that have been unable to heal. It is not pleasant and the cruel irony is that whilst your body aches for sleep every part of the day, often the pain makes sleep impossible so the lashes continue piling on lessening the chances to heal. And even when you are able to sleep you absorb it like a glutton and the result of such necessary indulgence is more pain.

Sleep for me is a constant struggle; I fight the need of it so I can stay awake to do a task, I wrestle with it as I want desperately to sleep yet the pain scares it off and I often fear to sleep as the chances are that when I wake I will feel just as bad or worse when I wake. I also fear that I am and will sleep my life away. This sounds quite bleak and mostly it is, but some days when insomnia persist through the night – like now – I get a surge of manic-like energy than makes me feel indestructible and full of optimistic plans of the day ahead…I’m going to set-up a website, read that book, walk the dog, write several pages… Alas, this feeling does not last long and the plans will just remain plans, but I love the feeling as it is a reminder of the old me and I will run with it for as long as I can – which will be probably be till 11.30 am. Take advantage of every little positive.

Sister Blog

I’ve just made my first post to the sister blog to this one. This blog is all about making the best of being ill, focusing on beauty. My new blog, which will run alongside this one will look at illness and disability on a personal and socio-political level. They are very different blogs so the new one may not interest those that enjoy this one but if you wanted to take a look it is called The Ill Represented.

 https://theillrepresented.wordpress.com/

Thanks for your time. x

[I have edited the link as I embarrassingly typed it in wrong – so sorry, should hopefully work now x]

Hiding in Anger

I have been distant from this blog for a little while as I’ve been struggling with the anger and frustration that constant pain gives. My aim was to keep this blog light-hearted and a little informative. I wanted it to express the small things I enjoy, a means to engage, to escape the bleakness that often encases me. I still aim to keep this blog light but I was unable to rally to the sentiment so that’s why I stayed away. I have realised now that the anger/frustration is a part of my story as a legitimate emotion and to deny it can make things worse. So I have now decided to let the rage out but I will do this on a separate blog as I hope to cover wider areas of concern for those of us with chronic illnesses and/or invisible disabilities, such as politics, healthcare, welfare and rights.

The other blog will be a little more ‘serious’ so that way I can keep this blog as I intended – fun! Those of us with chronic illnesses often have to separate areas of our life off into manageable pieces and have a duality to our characters (often a split between pre-sick and post-sick self) so I hope that this ramble has made some sense. I hope to set up this new blog soon, but first I have to visit the pain consultant tomorrow.